I’m gonna be myself today, so bear with me if I’m incoherent, or rather, don’t read. Its gonna be lengthy I think but its more or less for me to say my peace.
Life is moody.
Everyone else’s is.
Our lives meet in a path.
But we might no necessarily be experiencing the same.
So we fight.
Cos we’re different.
But when we are the same, its no better.
We like ourselves to be special.
I hate my teacher for hating me.
Even more so when he thinks that I hate him when I don’t at first.
So in the end we ended up hating each other.
You arse. I know.
People in their late twenties, having a mind of a child.
What things EQ can do.
The most sensitive creature in the world.
I really hate it.
I really hate it when someone wrongs me for nothing.
You freak. I can see.
But well, the most irritating thing is that I don’t care.
I’ll just swallow it since there’s nothing else left to do.
Acceptance has just got me wrong.
Today was the worst day I ever had.
For a reason, or rather reasons, not one of those suicidal moodwings I’ve got.
In fact I seldom ‘swing’ right now, I’m not even suicidal anymore.
Cos life’s too boring for etheral entertainment.
Then, my joke, I’m too addicted to life so much so that I can’t quit it.
I don’t even care who I am now.
Its just so stupid to always wish to know things.
You’ll just get disappointed in the end.
That’s why I’ve been telling my mom, how not to expect things to turn out good before it happens cos it’ll often kill you.
But that’s just a small matter, not some life or death ones.
She was rather shocked to hear that, people think I’m a very happy kid.
I acted like a parrot in debates today, when they were debating about animal’s use for human entertainment.
Hoho, it was funny I bet.
But it resulted in people not having enough time to prep.
And considering how noob I am in handling 3 sec 1s, I screwd them up I think.
Sorry. But no one will see this.
I’ve still got lots to do during the weekend, so much so that I don’t know where to start and I procrastinate on the choice.
I wish I could have been better but I know I’m not gonna to.
I live life according to whether I want it or not, according to my beliefs and other than that, I don’t care.
So I give up on things I don’t belief in and I don’t feel any pinch even though I know its not right.
I’ve been poning a lot of stuff lately.
But I don’t care cos it makes me feel okay, rather than bad.
I don’t ever get happy with anything, except for times on my own, doingf stuff that I feel like, especially sitting in the library for the whole day, reading books.
I’ll really hate it if anyone I knows walk past and talks or accompanies me.
I’m such a loner. But I can mix with everyone if I want to, but I don’t.
Ah, my life is complicated. Things are just so mixed up.
Blended in the concrete mixer till I can’t tell anything apart.
Bleh, I wish I were
Shit, I don’t know what I wish I were.
I have so much self-esteem now that I don’t have a drive for anything.
But my head refuses to swell as well.
You know these things, your head has to swell after reaching the highest point so someone will kick you down the hill for your ego.
Then you’ll begin the ascent up again.
But my head just refuses to balloon, so things are just what they are now.
So I was just wishing for someone, someone to turn up, someone real.
But I don’t know who’s real.
I think they should be dead bored to meet my requirements so I don’t have to catch up with them.
I think I’m fake.
I read about dead people’s tales, classics and find living authors plastic and artificial.
My life is getting in my way, shall I remove it?
I’ve got so many things to say but I don’t have the time.
Next time I shall blog like that.
So firstly, people won’t read.
Secondly, its a lot easier and more real.
I don’t have to play pretend or anything.
I could be myself.
Oh I really love plays now.
Cos they portray living people in the dead context (books)
That’s my life.
Well anyway, bye.
I love myself neutrally cos I can’t find anything else to love.