Moved: JusticeJustine.wordpress.com

And this marks the end of 23huisclos.wordpress.com , my oldest blog to date. Precisely 2 years and 7 months of age, I realised. If you don’t already know: I export my posts from an older blog to the newer blog when I move.

My departures from my previous blogs were always rather bitter, unavoidable though natural ones. They always involved me going through a ‘phase’, growing out of it and eventually finding the mood of the blog stifling. This one isn’t any different. I’ve had enough of it all.

With this, I direct you to JusticeJustine . I think I’ll only start writing in it a day after this post though. See you on that side.

D:

Pretty ‘horrified’ about something ‘but’ I was laughing manically along with it— along the process of its discovery. I think I’m 99% convinced about that now. This is horrible, ha-ha-ha-ha. I can’t seem to tolerate that.

Tsk. Tsk. Sigh.

Growth: Now and Then

I was browsing through my blog archives because I was bored and was just a little curious and wanted to get ‘updated’ about my past self. It’s funny. I don’t remember writing many things. It’s like a lost decade or something. This is quite a huge thing for me because if you’ve been interacting with me long enough, you’ll know that I remember the most random things and the trivia of the trivia.

Well, there were quite a few ‘interesting’ things about myself and the whole experience was extremely nostalgic. It’s currently in the wee hours of the morning and I may be caught red-handed anytime and be butchered for being on the computer or … to go down to the basics— being awake at all. So I’ll just feature one small thing here:
http://23huisclos.wordpress.com/2010/06/17/i-shall-start-to-live-positive-approach/

I skimmed through this and oh my, isn’t that pretty much who I am right now? Most of it— the more relevant parts, anyway. And it’s funny— I didn’t print that entry out and stick it on my wall to remind myself of it everyday or anything so such growth isn’t entirely made consciously. But I shan’t pry as it isn’t in my interest to do so.

Dear peers, I am living now!

Now: I am always happy with who I am. However, I am never content with who I am. I’ll keep growing everyday. What’s better than being ‘perfect’ is never being ‘perfect’. Goals and boundaries are continuously pushed and you discover infinities outside of infinities. And it’s turtles all the way down. A buffet and it all depends on how much you can bite off and chew.

Holidays Over

Alright, I officially declare that my ‘holidays’ are over. It’s a little over a month before I fly and 1 day less than 2 months before my school officially starts. I’ve got so much to catch up on and I’ve definitely ‘declined’ as a person.

I need to:

- Improve my handwriting

- Restore my grammar and language abilities and stop lazy-typing and lazy-speaking (It’s going to be hell for me in law if I were to continue this way. So peers, if you’re reading, do remind me if I ever fall back to such habits. Oh, actually, I just did. Sigh, I will stop using slang and mindless words to replace what I really mean to say.)

- Re-program my mind. This is a very broad term, yes. If you do see me around nowadays, I think you’ll know what I mean. I really lack rigour in my thoughts, I can’t bring myself to think about things, I’m basically just have this lazy and resort-island-vacation attitude towards everything. I also have a warped sense of time and I think that I have all the time in the world and days melt into each other and I seem to have no care for anything in the world. And I’m not even working, like most of my peers. I’m a real-lazy bum. It sounds like the good life, but not really. I realised that a ‘good life’ is challenging and fulfilling. I didn’t use ‘but’ because hey, they aren’t mutually exclusive in the first place. Basically, I’m rotting. And I’ve become rather simple-minded and one-tracked. etc. etc. etc. I’m going to work on all of these. I’m going to borrow less simple-minded books later, law books probably and am going to survey my curriculum and read generally on some of the things featured in it and think about things etc. I’m also going to finally write on my future law blog. I’m going to make things happen, finally. No more hanging around, lazing about the days.

- Survey my possessions and sort out things that I can bequeath to certain people before I leave for an abominably long time.

- Handle my ‘farewell’ details— I’ll not elaborate on here. But isn’t it funny? Farewell. Fare well. One will fare well in farewells.

- Start sorting out things that I want to bring away. Purchase things that I need.

- Fix my hair. I think it just got a little too boring for me again. But I don’t think I’m allowed to dye or do anything crazy to it at the moment so I’ll fiddle around with my scissors a little etc. We’ll see.

Here’s a good folk:

Chad VanGaalen – Sara (not the video) from Sub Pop Records on Vimeo.

What I’m listening to now: Old Songs

Browsing through my old songs. I was scrobbling what I played onto Lastfm and went around to read up on Voxtrot on my Lastfm scrobbler. I got a shock when I saw that they have 6 million plays up to date. This was the first song I knew from them and I was listening to them when they had only 1000+ plays! What …?! And apparently they’ve split up now. It’s been so long. I really dig this song.

I shan’t write descriptions for the others. Rather lazy. These are also a handful of songs of course— I’m listening to a lot more but it’s a little too insane to get everything on here. And many of them aren’t uploaded onto YouTube yet. Maybe I should upload them.

Personality Disorder Test Update

Now:

Paranoid |||||| 26% 49%
Schizoid |||||| 26% 53%
Schizotypal |||||||||||| 46% 53%
Antisocial |||||||||||| 50% 47%
Borderline |||||| 30% 47%
Histrionic |||||||||||||||| 62% 43%
Narcissistic |||||||||||| 46% 41%
Avoidant |||||||||| 34% 39%
Dependent |||||| 30% 37%
Obsessive-Compulsive |||||||||||||||| 62% 40%

*scores in gray are the average web score

September 10 2009: http://23huisclos.wordpress.com/2009/09/10/1470/

Paranoid |||||||||||||||| 66% 49%
Schizoid |||||||||||||||||||| 90% 53%
Schizotypal |||||||||||||||||| 74% 53%
Antisocial |||||||||||| 50% 47%
Borderline |||||||||||||||| 70% 47%
Histrionic |||||||||||| 42% 43%
Narcissistic |||||||||| 34% 41%
Avoidant |||||||||||||||| 70% 39%
Dependent || 10% 37%
Obsessive-Compulsive |||||||||||||||| 62% 40%
*scores in gray are the average web score
This is amazing. I thought of taking the test again for the fun of it and for curiosity’s sake. I knew I changed a lot recently and was also aware of how I changed and the test indicated most of those. A very helpful way of summarising everything that’s been happening to me. It also fits in with my mbti change from INTJ to ENTP.
And no (to potential haters of tests like this— I foresee some reading this entry), I don’t worship this test. I take this as an indicator. The same goes for MBTI. And they have often guided my life along in a positive way. So if you’re hating, please hate in the open by posting a comment and we’ll be up for a debate instead of hating in the shadows.
HUGE drops: Schizoid, paranoid, schizotypal, borderline, avoidant
Increases: Histrionic, narcissistic, dependent
Same-ies: Anti-social, obsessive-compulsive
———————————————————————————–
Eccentric Personality Disorders: Paranoid, Schizoid, Schizotypal

Individuals with these disorders often appear odd or peculiar.

Paranoid Personality Disorder – individual generally tends to interpret the actions of others as threatening.
Schizoid Personality Disorder – individual generally detached from social relationships, and shows a narrow range of emotional expression in various social settings.

Schizotypal Personality Disorder – individual is uncomfortable in close relationships, has thought or perceptual distortions, and peculiarities of behavior.

Dramatic Personality Disorders: Antisocial, Borderline, Histrionic, and Narcissistic

Individuals with these disorders have intense, unstable emotions, distorted self-perception, and/or behavioral impulsiveness.

Antisocial Personality Disorder – individual shows a pervasive disregard for, and violation of, the rights of others.

Borderline Personality Disorder – individual shows a generalized pattern of instability in interpersonal relationships, self-image, and observable emotions, and significant impulsiveness.

Histrionic Personality Disorder – individual often displays excessive emotionality and attention seeking in various contexts. They tend to overreact to other people, and are often perceived as shallow and self-centered.

Narcissistic Personality Disorder – individual has a grandiose view of themselves, a need for admiration, and a lack of empathy that begins by early adulthood and is present in various situations. These individuals are very demanding in their relationships.

Anxious Personality Disorders: Avoidant, Dependent, Obsessive-Compulsive

Individuals with these disorders often appear anxious or fearful.

Avoidant Personality Disorder – individual is socially inhibited, feels inadequate, and is oversensitive to criticism

Dependent Personality Disorder – individual shows an extreme need to be taken care of that leads to fears of separation, and passive and clinging behavior.

Obsessive-Compulsive Personality Disorder – individual is preoccupied with orderliness, perfectionism, and control at the expense of flexibility, openness, and efficiency.

Joseph Birdsong – Modern Science

I’ve been browsing through my old songs. This song really calms me down— its vibes. And I really need it right now. Some kind of emotional roller-coaster. It’s been a while since I’ve watched a 5awesomegays video though. That was how I first started listening to Joseph Birdsong. That is one hell of an awesome last name.

This entire thing is just incredulous.